I’ve tried my share of sex toys, but one that I really like is an egg shaped one. The egg is flexible enough to fit various sizes inside of it, and can be easily washed out for repeated use. Under normal circumstances, the egg can last for a long time, but in my home, they get destroyed after a few months. My dog always finds a way to get into my room when I’m out of the house and chews on my eggs. He has plenty of chew toys, so I’m not sure why he feels the need to chew on the eggs.

My theory is that since the eggs have my scent on them, the dog can easily track them down. He probably chews on them because he misses me, and the eggs are the closest thing to him to me being there. I guess I should be glad that he isn’t chewing on my clothes or some of my more valuable items, but I still wish that he wouldn’t get hold of my eggs. I’m always worried when he does chew on them, because there is a chance that he could bite hard enough on the egg one day and swallow a piece of it. Depending on how long it takes me to get back home, a piece of the egg may do terrible damage to the dog, or worse.

I’m going to hide my eggs in a high location, like a shelf on my closet. The dog shouldn’t be able to open the closet door or climb up to the shelf, but dogs are smart, so just in case any of that happens, I’ve also placed the eggs inside of a locked box. There’s no way my dog can find the key for the box and put it inside.